My mental cleansing

 We simplified a good bit of furniture before the move. It was quit a surprised to move into a house with only:

* 1 single linen closet

* 1 regular two door closet (in the girls room)

* 3 shelves next to my washer and dryer for storage ( tools, sports equipment)

* 1 bed frame that stores 6 baskets

* no garage

* no attic

* no basement


So even with all my self righteous "down sizing do gooder talk" my storage bins still laughed at me saying  "Well, I bet you didn't see that coming!"  I most certainly did not, so we downsized again. This week has been the third downsize. It was my closet, which I share one door side with the girls so it can get tight with all us ladies finding something to wear. It looks much better so yesterday I sat and thought "On to the next task!" Unfortunately now I had something a little more in depth than organizing tank tops. It was cleaning up my thoughts. My focus has been all over lately from Ava's new school, to doctors appointments, behavior, new local foods, and hanging out with other women. I have been socially overstimulated with meeting a TON of new people, and you know me, I love people. But it has been a bit overwhelming. Trying to remember names, their children's name, then my last conversation I had with them.

I also have been noticing me being a bit lazy in my consideration, my casualness to just saying things before confirming my thoughts. I knew today when I out load said I knew something wasn't true but continued to have a conversation about it anyway. I had this huge weight put on me when I got in the car and I could hear " What was that? You don't even support that kind of talk, why are you allowing this to creep in?" Thankfully this new friend of mine is quite patient and was very casual with my topic.

But I was faced with clearing this blasé, non connective conversations out of my thoughts and off my tongue. It's never good to talk just to talk. Without meaning you are wasting your efforts. I am starting a cleanse. Here is my new but old daily remedy I am restarting:

* Wake up and stretch even if it's for 2 minutes

* Pray

* Give each person in my family a word of encouragement as I greet them

* Acknowledge that my day can be as beautiful as I choose it to be and pray it will

* Read, no one is ever growing when they aren't learning

* Meditiate

* Tell someone something great about them

* Pray

We're dreamers with grounded feet-metaphorically speaking

 "I dream because we're made to, I do dream because." 

I come from a long line family of entrepreneurs and go getters. I love that that they chose the road less traveled because they ultimately got the bigger reward. My great grandfather was the started of one of the fastest growing construction businesses in Iowa in the 40's and 50's. His wife Ava, opened the first women owned boutique in there town and the had one of the first televisions in their home. That got them are larger number of house guests than they planned. Both my grandmothers were activists-one for democratic politics and civil rights and one for love, peace and Jesus.

My parents, one who did not finish college and one who never bothered with it, started a company wise beyond there years. One of the first in the background checking industry came one hugely successful business after the other. My mom who was the president on many boards in the community always showed me women can go just as far as a man can. Richard now jokes about how I was raised by a feminist. (He wasn't too far off) Now both are successful investors and could be retired before fifty they continue to grow their ideas and multiple businesses. They have planted seeds in my sister and I not to settle for mediocracy. We grew up being given endless education opportunities, extra curricular activities and outlets to find our niches in life. I married a man who became his own boss and owned a business at twenty three and continues to impress me with his alternative work approach.

photography by whatadayphotography

 What can I say we are dreamers, visionaries, lovers of the unknown. We have moved over seas with a dream of a newer, brighter life for ourselves and our children. But not without thinking twice or even three or four times for that matter. I still haven't figured out where I got my grounding from but through my eyes things are very black and white. They either work or they don't, they either help or they don't. So though I dream I dream with my eyes wide open. And truly asking my motives in working towards those dreams. And for all your assurances, this dream of ours to live better and happier is coming true. Keep dreaming and dream big!


"I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal." Martin Luther King Jr.


"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new. " Albert Einstein

"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world." Harriet Tubman

Accepting Acceptance

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. -- Plato

We live our lives checking off who we are to others. Are you a new patient--check. Have you enjoyed your experience--check. Caucasian--check. 

I can always appreciate when someone tells me they enjoy my company. Not necessarily through words, but through simple acknowledgments that I am accepted. No matter what place in life we are, we all are looking for solid relationships. It is so crucial to our everyday life because everyday life seems to knock us down quite a bit. I have recently been putting more of my focus on acceptance. I used to have this box of understanding. I also have another box of, "I'll figure that our later." But recently those two boxes overlapped!

Before I speak in specifics I will clear up and confirm my experiences and views of God. I've experienced the comfort in being a child of the unconditional Father and maker of our heavens and our earth. I've experienced God in a personal and loving way. He has offered me a choice to have eternal life through belief in his son Jesus Christ, who lived, died, and resurrected providing a way for his children to be with him for eternity. Because of the acceptance I have had from God, I feel compelled to give others that same love. God does not expect me or anyone to be perfect. In fact he knows we won't achieve perfection. 

God has designed us with all different skin tones, voices, body types and genders. Yet we still have two things in common--our desire for love and our inability to achieve perfection. Which takes me back to the topic of my boxes. I understood that as a follower of God, it is frowned upon to be a person who is gay or lesbian. I also understood that all people are created equal and in the image of God. I understood that everyone has equal rights to worship God in our country. I too understood that no sin is bigger than the other in God’s eyes. In my box of "I'll figure that out later" was the idea of a person who had my same "box of understanding", agreed with everything within that box, but also happened to be gay. Then recently these two boxes overlapped and I was silent with my thoughts--realizing what this meant to me. 

I now had a choice to eliminate one item out of my "I'll figure that out later box" and could move it to my "box of understanding". But how? I know that no one deserves to suffer and feel rejected by people when they have already been forgiven and accepted by their Savior. If sinful actions are actions themselves, but being gay for most men and women is not something they choose, then is it in a box of sinful actions? Or knowing you are pretending to be a heterosexual person when you know you are not more of a sinful act? Can you be a believer in Christ as well as accepting yourself as a person who is gay?

I was given this link and if you are interested to learn more like I did, please take a look at this website from two sides of believers in God and their openminded and accepting views of the gay and lesbian community. www.gaychristian.net

I will close with two statements from this message that really stood out to me:

"Parties on both sides must be ready to say we can be wrong."

                                    and

"Each has to say there is something to be learned here."


Here are some facts that Americans have today about their views of gay rights. Gallup released its annual findings on sexuality that tell how we have changed. As of a couple weeks ago, more than 50 percent of Americans now accept gay relationships. What's more, 78 percent of Americans now believe gay Americans should be allowed to serve in the military, while 48 percent believe gay Americans should have the right to marry. Read more at: www.oprah.com

We Are Blessed To Camp In Our Own Backyard

The start, don't believe his face. This guy is pumped.

I'm working hard contributing to the documentation part.

If you want a cooked marshmallow, here's your guy!

Our wonderful campsite

Gosh, these two are cute!

Now time for shadow puppets and goodnight!

Behind the Colors

"We are no longer happy as soon as we wish to be happier."

For every woman there is usually at least one feature she will ultimately try to enhance. So why do we play this game of seeking out compliments only to change whatever it was we got compliments for in the first place? Answer: We have been told a real woman was never good enough to begin with. Statistics show 75% of normal women think they are overweight. 90% of women overestimate their body size, and 50% of American women are currently dieting. Not that I am against being conscious of what you are putting into your hands which ultimately decides what you put in your body. My focus is more on being healthy and balanced. "7 in 10 Girls believe they are not good enough or do not measure up in some way including their looks, performance in school and relationship with friends and family members." -girls self esteem


I was recently given some intriguing information from my Mom about what an E.R. experience at a hospital is like. You are rushed in and one of the first things the nurses will do is put medicine patches all over you.  They do this because if only takes twenty seconds for your body to absorb something on the surface of your skin. Therefore you are getting the medicine almost instantly. So this poses the question, what is in our make up, soaps, lotions and cremes that we are absorbing within twenty seconds too? Find out what your products have in them at skindeep


At some point over the course of seven years I asked Richard his view of ruffles. He laughed and began to explain that ruffles are feminine which is probably why we women like them. Basically when women wear ruffles, it's for other women. Within a few short months I also read an article stating that a company had taken a woman in heels and asked a panel of men there view of her. They next only switched her shoes to flats and asked another panel of men their views. The conclusion was the men found the woman to be just as attractive with flats to heels. They did the same with a woman in red lipstick and without the red lipstick. The result was quite similar to the first, most men showed equal interest to the woman but some men said the lipstick was actually a turn off.  Not one man ever complained about the woman when not wearing lipstick. 


So WHO are we dressing for? Who are we wearing all this toxic make up for? And why are we hurting our feet and killing our backs if guys like some cute ballet flats? Get Real With Barbie I still wear mascara in our date nights feeling a bit prettier even though I didn't have it on all week around him. Ultimately we all have our red lipstick mentality. I'm am the anti-Barbie and nude is my new red. 

Earth Mammas

I had another great phone call today with My Abbey ( I know she's not just mine but this is what I call her) and she told em about their plans for her oldest son, Gino's fall break in September. They are planning on staying at an organic homestead in North Georgia for the week. A homestead is an educational center and farm where you can stay for a short visit or a long one to work and live at their farm. Perez Family of five (3 children under he age of 7) plan to stay over night for several days while enjoying the benefits of milking the goats and gathering eggs in the mornings and picking seasonal fruits and vegetables for snacks. And being alongside workers at the farm who are providing care to the animals.

She told me she looked up Hawaii which also has some homesteads. This got me thinking... then I found this! kahumanafarms.org less than 35 minutes away on our same coast. Amazing! I am suuuuper pumped, but I also want to confirm their are no farms in our more local Pupukea area. THE slogan, yes there is a slogan for the North Shore is keep the country country. We live in an amazing place and I have been so thankful to have so many local resources for food. I have already come into contact with a local farmer who offers seasonal and fresh baskets refills every Monday afternoon who literally lives on the closest dirt road to our son's school. Amazing how things just fall into place! Vote on the Farm Bill

Talking with Abbey reminded me of Laura's experience with staying at a farm last year. T-man was less than 6 months as I can recall and he, Laura and Xavier all went to help clean up their farmers property. By doing so they camped in a tent. She got home she showed us she was covered in bites from...chiggers. Curs-ed southern chiggers you got another one of us!

I've recently been talking to several newly pregnant friends all of which either want to be as natural as possible either for their first time or go more natural their second. I am delighted to be a part of the pregnancy to encourage and support in anyway possible. I love being able to share how much food can effect our bodies as well as our little ones.


My new favorite read is by far Alicia Silverstone's the kind diet , who lives a vegan lifestyle and was a healthy vegan through her whole pregnancy! Yes, she gained weight, check it out if you are interested. Whether your'e vegan or not it the importance of how to choose your food. Buying seasonal, local and the way a farmer slaughters their  animals are the three most important things I have learned in buying food. Does your food have pesticides in them even after you wash?

My Lovely Linlys

 My beautiful girls share Lyn & Lin in their names. We are big on nicknames, if I give you one I do it out of love. With our last name Lee, we accidentally created a wonderful nickname for the both of them. Therefore the nickname Linly was created. Now Ava 3 1/2 and Quin 20 months I can already see how close their bond is. I simply adore them.

You float and fly and I sing for you

You grow and give and I go with you

You love and live and I pray for you

You create and stand and call to you

You ache and hurt and I shelter you

You take rest and be and I will wait for you

Every memory that I can recall started and ended with you

Though we stood nearly the same height, we saw two different views 

Without you I'd have no one to share my room, my clothes, my toys

without you I'd have no one to share my hurts or my joys

When your'e around I laugh a bit louder and smile a bit more

My sister it is you I will always adore

Dublin Time

Erin Go Bragh! For those of you who don't know this Irish term it means: Ireland forever. My sister is getting ready to go to what is our homeland and we couldn't be more excited for her. She is planning to live abroad for 3 months in Dublin, Ireland but before she does she came to visit us one more time before leaving at the end of August.On both sides of my family we are Irish. As well as Richard is Irish on his moms side. When Richard and I plan out our daydream vacation without the kids we talk about backpacking through Ireland. Seeing the huge rocky edges along the coast, the lush green hills, touring the local pubs(I don't drink beer but why would I not see the pubs?) and staying in hostiles or our new friends through couchsurfing.

(side note)A common theme I have noticed about the Irish, they are quick to do 4 things:

1. make babies
2. get in fights with anyone
3. drink alcohol for any occasion
4. have red in our skin whether we're drinking or not

Alyssa spent the week visiting and playing with us, it was wonderful. She always makes me so relaxed because she's the one person that can be in are home where the kids are half naked and I'm yelling at them for fighting and being half naked and she just smiles and helps alleviate some of the stress. We stayed up most nights talking on the couch, playing games and personality quizzes. She even got to play the "bad guy aka me" and put the girls to bed again for the 3rd time. Thrilling!

I can't say enough about how nice it was to have her stay with us, she got to sleep in The Boy's room and he bunked on the trundle of the girls bed. A little strange I'm sure, but she'd never complain partly because she's easy to please and partly because everyone wants to sleep in a boat bed.

Her newest adventures will be great for sure but of course I needed to feel like I was apart of this journey so.... I insisted she bring and wear my trench coat! Oh, the joys of being in Hawaii and the seasons never shifting too far from late spring. I'm so looking forward to seeing all the places she goes so she can recommend them for us in give or take ten years, haha. Until we see each other next sweet Alyssa and sweet Ireland, stay beautiful and Erin Go Bragh!

Ode To Date Night

 Our first date night since moving here. The food took unusually long, which we had all the time in the world so I didn't mind. It was delicious, fresh fish and sushi has been such a treat upon arriving here.  We tried just taking one at the restaurant but our camera was sensitive to how close Richard was holding it. So we got home and Alyssa took these... Thank you our sweet sis and thank you Richard for taking me!

We plan to add more date pictures in December when we are having our first trip away (just Richard and I) since our son's been born. Our anniversary is in December and Alyssa comes back in mid-December. She has really been encouraging and we can't wait!!!!! We are going to be staying near by on the North Shore BUT it will be just us for  a day or so and won't have to have fun based on a nap schedule, unless it's our own.

Feeding Forgiveness Part 2

I had an awesome phone call today. A much needed and appreciated phone call from my cousin. Sometimes when there is too much time questions can be created. Not that questions don't come around when there is little time but when you have large gaps of distance due to distraction, questions appear. One of the question that lingered for the both of us was " Does she still have time for me?" and " Am I still important?"

Despite our efforts time is not on our side. We make excuses, we all are legitimately busy, a little too busy. Something I don't enjoy about my life is how busy we can get. Now a days it takes little effort to be busy and much more effort to be available. I want to be more available, I am choosing to be more present. It was so nice to catch up, break down worries, and simply just hear her voice. She has always been a treasured person to me, I grew up seeing her every holiday and every summer for most of my life. We did it all wore matching dresses, planned which spice girl we were going to be, even terrorized the neighborhood boys together. I am happy to see how loved she is by her fiance and continue to be impressed with her independence.

Today was an encouraging day and a reminder that even when you aren't talking, someone is. We all have that little voice telling us things, and they are normally destructive comments. Since we cannot ever fully eliminate that voice we can at least dull it down with truth and effort in our relationships. She is getting married in October and I am hoping to have a front row seat their whether it be through Skype or not. I love you SVS. You will always be my Syd The Kid!